My husband and I went snorkeling on our honeymoon.
Sounds perfectly wonderful right?
Wrong.
M- and I headed out into the water around a peninsula away from the shore about 3/4 of a mile, and the comfort of the resort we where we were staying. The afternoon was drenched in sun, the sugar colored sand glistening, and the water so clear you could see about 50 feet away from you, ahhh-mazing.
While we were out there admiring the flora and fauna of the sea, I saw something out of the corner of my eye. A dark shadow.
Immediately my brain went to the most deep, dark place a mind can go when swimming in open water. SHARK.
Seriously, a shark, right there next to us...or so I thought.
I have never gotten to shore as fast as I did that day. Frantic, arms flailing, water splashing, legs akimbo, I was mustering up any and all recollection I had of being on the swim team when I was ten. I kept thinking "BUTTERFLY, BACK-STROKE, BREAST-STROKE, SHARK!!!!"
In the background of my own internal crazed screaming I kept hearing, "Jennifer, J-, Jeennn, What the, JJJEEEEENNNNN!!!!"
When I got close enough to the shore that I could stand up and run, I did, and I ran fast, yelling "'NO! there's a shark!!!!!"
Thank goodness it was the off season and there was were only a few other couples staying at the resort, and if they heard me screaming about the shark, they just kept it between themselves. "THERE'S ALWAYS ONE MAUDE, CRAZY SHARK SCREAMING FOOL!"
During the screaming on the beach I began to get worried. Where was M-????? I had booked so quickly, I forgot to warn him.
He had been eaten, or at least been bitten by the shark. I just knew it.
Panic, well more panic, the heart stopping, sound numbing panic that set in was overwhelming. I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO TELL MY NEW IN-LAWS THEIR SON HAD BEEN EATEN BY A SHARK.
All of a sudden someone emerged from the water.
It was M-.
I was so happy, like jumping up and down happy.
Then I remembered the shark. How had M- evaded the shark?
M-: What shark?
me: The one I saw that propelled me to shore! What do you mean 'what shark?'?
M: There was no shark. I was rinsing my goggles, and dropped them, next thing I knew you high tailed out of there.
me: What? seriously?
M-: Seriously. And you left me out there trying to get my goggles from the bottom of the ocean, like 20 feet down! I have been going up and down, up and down, for the past 15 minutes!!
me: At least you didn't get eaten by that shark.
