makes me a dull girl!
Let me take a minute and fill you in on where I've been and what I've been up to! This semester has been really full!
Just as I think I am going to fall flat on my face, another assignment comes along! So basically I am being propped up by books that need to be read, articles that need analyzing, paint that is still drying, labs that need testing and MATH, oh my word the math. For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to take 2 math classes congruently. Bad idea. Now these aren't crazy maths like real people take, these are maths for liberal arts majors, that's more than enough for me!
When I graduated high school a hundred years ago, all of my friends knew what they were going to do, where they wanted to go and who they wanted to be. Yeah, right, I know NOW, none of that matters now for most of them, but at the time it was such a big deal. I'm sure now that there were other kids like me, who had NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL they were gonna do, I guess they just kept quiet. But it felt really lonely.
So, I did what I thought I should do, enter college. All that got me was a couple of failed classes and a hangover. For me, entering college so unsure of myself made for a pretty miserable combination.
For years I thought, heck, didn't work for me, no biggie. Then I started to get an itch. No! Not that itch, we'll talk about that later. A yearning for something new, bigger than myself and challenging. I'll tell you right now, managing how someone pours milk, or cooks a steak has it's days, but no real complexity or value at the end of my day.
For years I talked myself out of going back to school, until the great breakdown of aught eight. I suddenly couldn't function properly, couldn't get out of bed, work was a disaster and I COULDN'T CONTROL THE CRYING! Oh lordy the crying! I went and checked myself in. I could go home at night, but for weeks the days belonged to a therapist and group. I felt like I only had one other option, and well, that one is the worst for everyone involved, so I chose to start over instead.
Okay, gotta run and get to class--More to come.
