Lately I've been failing at this "Getting it right" thing.
Okay, failure is a thing, I get it. I have bad days, but I know they will soon be over. Right now it just feels like this overwhelmed, grouchy, unsure feeling is looming ahead for a while.
As far as I'm concerned this is not acceptable. I've been working too hard, focusing in, and taking care of my physical and mental health for me to loose this focus and succumb to a few bad days.
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How to run an unintentional 15K.
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- Decide to take a "different route"
- Run along and realize you really have NOIDEA where you are...other than on a road in the park.
- Come to a 'T' in the road.
- Realize this 'T' is Route 3.
- 4 Lane highway with a median, speed limit 55 (so you know everyone is doing 72)
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**Note** Do NOT do the next step. Under any conditions. I DO NOT condone my own behavior. My bad decision. The worst decision I have EVER made in my life. E. V. E. R.
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- Needless to say, because I am here yping, I made it accross.
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So, after I got home I went and figured the mileage, I felt like I had run 100 miles. In the end I had run 9.43 miles, or 15.1K.
My time wasn't great, but for getting lost, looking at my phone, asking for directions, and slowing down, looking around, and marveling at my dumb choices, not so bad.
Thankfully it was a beautiful day for a run, started out around 31, and tapered off around 47. It was a good practice of running in the cold for me and patience with myself.
I have been running more and more and am loving this journey. I think the hardest part of today was not being mentally prepared. I made poor decisions along the way and really brought this upon myself. Usually I am pretty good with dealing with ambiguity. Running has lead me into this grey area a few times, but nothing like this. Here's the thing--made it. As simple as that. I made it out (in one piece...literally), mentally and physically.
This is an exciting realization, and I'm looking forward to continuing this journey.
Just not accross Route 3 again.
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I'm ready to do a WHOLE LOTTA goal smashing this year! I thought 2014 was my year, but I'm begining to suspect 2015 is going to surpass it leaps and bounds!
How about you? What are some things you are working on? Focusing on? Setting your sights on?
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We celebrated my husband's birthday the other night.
He hates birthday parties. He hates when people sing Happy Birthday.
Too bad.
We had a mini cake and ice cream party at my in-laws house with a few of his favorite people anyway!
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Everyother year I make a him a wacky cake, well an un-cake cake.
Two years ago it was the Swiss-roll cakes cake.
This year? A donut hole cake.
This was a big hit!
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This might be my new go-to dessert when I'm bringing something to share.
Too simple.
Too delicious.
And really? Who doesn't like a donut?
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Really, there are no words that can express what's going on in my head right now.
I think my smile says it all.
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I have been making some MAJOR changes to the way I eat. (More on that someday) I been removing refined sugars and carbohydrates from my diet. because of that I have been trying to find a semi-substitute for cake-y, bread-y deliciousness.
Breads and simple carbohydrates are a trigger food for me...they make me want more and more sugar! Not to mention they make me sleepy, sluggish and hungry much quicker than when I eat more protein rich foods.
Here's the recipe, Hope you like it! try it and let me know what you think.
A super yummy low-carb, low sugar treat
2 ½ cups of almond flour
½t sea salt
1t baking soda
¼ cup Unsweetened Shredded Coconut
½ cup fresh or frozen blueberries
2 Eggs, beaten
¼ cup honey
¼ cup granulated baking splenda (or your favorite sugar free substitue) (or sub the honey for another ¼ cup of the splenda)
Recipe JWMGorman 2013
You can Download the recipe right here!
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Yesterday while visiting with my nieces and nephew we had a "Spa Day" Each of the kids got their nails polished and a fake haircut by Aunt Fer-Fer (that's me yo!).
After I fininshed each 'client's' nails they each told me how much they liked them.
But M- exclaimed in her most adorable six-year-old voice
"Aunt Fer-Fer...THIS just SCREAMS ME!
I love, love, love it!"
I love, love, love you too little girl.
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Where have I been?
I have been asking myself the very same thing these few weeks.
I’m here.
I’m there.
But really, I’m not sure.
This shit is getting real.
2013 is a huge year for me. I am a college graduate. Like I’ve said before, I never thought I would actually finish college. I always dreamed of it, and made a few attempts, but this time it is real. It is real because of the amazing support I have had from family and friends through each step of the way.
From my husband who is a rock, supportive to the core, although he is worried/cautious about the loans we have taken to finance this adventure, more important to him is my happiness, and how this will benefit both of us in the near future.
My parents who just kept telling me “I knew you could do it.” “You are NOT too old” “We are so proud of you. My dad talking me off the ledge when I felt like I was in over my head, had I made the right decision, was I going to be accepted into the program; all of the could I? should I? and would I?’s of my brain. My mom who kept me focused on the prize, even when I was sure I had failed my first class, or even gotten below a B in anything, she was right…I got a B+.
My husband’s family who helped keet me motivated, donated to my textbook fund, and were there just for a hug when I needed one.
My three younger sisters who constantly supported my decision, encouraged, and were some of my biggest cheerleaders throughout this journey.
Countless friends. Oh man, my friends. I am lucky to have the people in my life that I do. I don’t have hundreds of friends, but the ones I do have are really more like family. I’m Aunt Jenn to their kids, we go on vacations together, they visit from far and wide, we talk, sometimes we don’t talk often enough… we drink coffee, we laugh out loud, we cry, but the support and encouragement from each of them has been a huge motivator for me.
I’ve never heard so many people tell me they are proud of me, and that I have inspired them to do something big, something different. WOW. You guys inspire ME!
To say I am humbled beyond belief from the support and kind words would be a huge understatement.
Thank you.
P.S. I promise to stop the graduation talk...for a bit, before you know it I won't be able to shut up about grad school!!!
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The other day I had to have a procedure done at the hospital, nothing big, but it required anesthesia so someone had to drive me there and back.
Enter my husband. Duh.
After the procedure in the PACU he was there and we were joking around after I woke up. When I'm nervous I talk EVEN MORE than I usually do, and M- of course was taking good care of me. While were talking to the nurse she said
Nurse: "Do you guys work together?"
We both looked at each other an laughed.
Me: "No, why?"
Nurse: "Oh, you just act like you are together 24-7."
Me: "Well, not 24-7 but a lot. Whys is that surprising?"
Nurse: "Oh, you guys are just having so much fun together, laughing and talking!"
Me: "Well, we ARE married. That must be it"
Nurse: laughing hysterically, "That usually means the exact opposite, you have no idea."
Kinda made M- and I feel good. We do have our moments, but most of those a good ones.
Thankful for my honey.
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School is finally out, and I think I have recovered from the craziest semester ever. My final semester of undergraduate school.
I am a college graduate.
Let that sink in a bit more.
I.
AM.
A.
COLLEGE.
GRADUATE.
I realize a ton of people have done that in the past, and many more will graduate in the future, but guess what now I am one of them.
What exactly does that mean? Well loans and now More. School. I am finally at the point where I will begin to be able give something more back & hopefully help someone become whole again.
Like someone helped me a few years ago.
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So after a fun summer of volunteering, art making, work, and misc. fun my adventure back into school resumes. I will be attending Eastern Virginia Medical School in August.
I will be studying Art Therapy and Counseling. This is what all this work has lead up to...me being a grown-up.
Ha. Me a grown-up? Never.
When I started school I was excited to go back, but never REALLY imaginied I would come to the point of actually fininshing my bachelors. I had tried 2 times before without success.
This time was different. With the support of a great family, awesome friends, and the most loving, gentle, fun, kind, supportive, and patient husband ----> I did it.
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On another note... I've been working a little watercolor painting recently.
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Based on a post I did about Harper's passing sprung a story for my digital storytelling blog, and this little video...
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hug a helper.
Any one of the millions, if a hug's not your thing...shake their hand, look into their eyes and say Thank You
I think this is one of the most important things we can do regularly, but especially during weeks like these.
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And just for good measure, I thought I'd put this out there...
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Watercolor and graphite. --> Something I haven't done before.
This my friend's (and old, er- former boss's) pup. Hansome Jim.
This picture was so hard to resist painting. So. I gave in and painted him.
I was so happy to hear how much these pups parents were with the finished painting.
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"I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive."
- Gilda Radner
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